There’s a lot of things I didn’t finish during my Christmas vacation. I have three very different half-written blog posts that I wanted to squeeze in before the end of the year. I spun my wheels for many reasons, one being that I wasn’t sure that the particular mood or perspective on the issue under discussion was something I wanted to put out there. This is similar to one of the reasons that I didn’t do any updates about my goals for the last few months. After completing the move, I re-evaluated the goals, because two of the big goal categories had been centered on the move and things that we had to take care of before moving. And certain parts of the new goals weren’t topics that I felt were appropriate to share in a public blog post.

The other problem I had was that I was trying to get my Patreon creator’s page sorted out. I’d set it up with an introduction and some levels and things, but the rewards or whatever you want to call them were contradictory, and not necessarily things that I could really commit to on a monthly basis. So I was trying to get that plan sorted out. And it occurred to me that a monthly blog post about my goals and how I was doing on them was more appropriate there, and is a fairly common sort of benefit to get at a low level of patronage. So it would defeat the purpose of the Patreon if I were sharing those posts for free at this blog, right?

Then there was just the craziness and stress of work, the holidays, the continuing existential crisis posed by our current political system, trying to figure out how to take care of ourselves for the holidays without have to navigate the minefield of my trump-supporting and often homophobic relatives, and NaNoWriMo and my actual writing (which is what a lot of the goals, particularly the ones that ought to be shared on Patreon are in aid of), and so on…

Not to mention the panic kicked off when Patreon announced the big change in fees that caused thousands of patrons to rescind their pledges and the creators to start scrambling for alternatives before the policy was rescinded!

The upshot is that I’m still trying to find a new rhythm to get my workweek, writing, and social life in synch…. Continue reading Confessions of an equivocator with delusions of ruthlessness →