Friday Five (politics are morals in action edition)


Welcome to the third Friday of 2022!

It was again a weird week for reasons that just are too weird to go into.

Anyway, it’s time for another Friday Five in which I bring you: one story about something a lot of us were already thinking, another about the majesty of the cosmos, the top five stories of the week, five stories of interest to queers and out allies, five stories about traitors and similar criminals, five stories about haters, and five stories about the pandemic. Plus some notable obituaries.

This Week in Things a Lot of Us Were Thinking:

Howard Stern: Hospitals Should REFUSE to Treat Unvaccinated

This Week in the Universe is Awesome:

A Star-Producing, Cosmic Bubble Shrouds Our Solar System

Stories of the Week:

Opinion | An anti-Black backlash — with no end in sight

California salmon returning to old spawning grounds

Supreme Court rejects Trump’s bid to shield records from Jan. 6 committee

Here’s why some LGBTQ students in Utah say their health education is inadequate

Felony charges are 1st in a fatal crash involving Autopilot

Stories of Interest to Queers and Our Allies:

64 things Joe Biden has done for the LGBTQ community during his first year in office

Jim Obergefell, who gave name to landmark Supreme Court case, to run for Ohio House

Andrew Blaser makes U.S. Olympic history as the first out gay man in this super fast ice sport

The writer behind the new bisexual Superman has turned death threats into donations for LGBTQ youth

Gilead says counterfeit HIV drugs ended up with patients

This Week in Seditious Treason and Other Major Crimes:

Jan. 6 Suspect James Grant Sent Back to Jail After DWI Arrest

Proud Boy "Tiny" Toese Goes to Jail

Trump Family Gets Late Night Love Note From New York Attorney General

Oath Keepers stockpiled 30 days of supplies, rifles ahead of Jan. 6

Five things to know about the New York AG’s pursuit of Trump

This Week in Homophobes and Other Haters:

Holy Bullies and Headless Monsters: ‘Gays recruit children’ – The intricate networking behind a simple but ugly lie

These groups are pushing an anti-LGBTQ agenda disguised as health care

YouTube Deletes Ex-Gay Torture Rant As Hate Speech

After DirecTV dropped the channel, OAN host asked viewers to dig up dirt on AT&T’s board chairman

MSNBC guest skewers Kyrsten Sinema as type of white person “Martin Luther King Jr. warned us about”

This Week in the Pandemic:

Vaccination protects against Covid-19 hospitalization significantly more than prior infection, according to CDC study

‘Back Alley’ Advice Is Making The Pandemic Worse

"They used us as an experiment": Arkansas inmates who were given ivermectin to treat COVID file federal lawsuit against jail

Supreme Court rejects bid to block mask mandate on airplanes

A record 9 million Americans are out sick as COVID rates surge

In Memoriam:

Raymond Washburn, who rescued 5 people during Oklahoma City bombing, dies

Yvette Mimieux Dead: Actress Who Starred In ‘The Time Machine’ Was 80

Friday Five (to sir, with love edition)


Welcome to the second Friday of 2022!

It has been a very exhausting week–for reasons that are way too complicated to go into at this juncture.

Anyway, it’s time for another Friday Five in which I bring you: two stories about so-called adults acting like spoiled toddlers, the top five stories of the week, five stories of interest to queers and out allies, five stories about sex traffickers and similar criminals, and five stories about deplorables and traitors. Plus some notable obituaries.

This Week in Angry Toddlers:

Trump Rage-Quits NPR Interview After He’s Grilled on Election-Fraud Lies

Capitol rioter storms out of hearing after judge orders him back behind bars: ‘I’m done with this’

Stories of the Week:

Takeaways from the landmark sedition indictment against the Oath Keepers and why DOJ acted now

Supreme Court blocks Biden Covid vaccine mandate for businesses, allows health-care worker rule

UCLA-led team may have found way to kill HIV-infected cells

Stiffed Bartender Fingers Key West Landmark Arsonists – Bartender’s tip leads to arrest in Key West buoy burning

Democrat Cherfilus-McCormick wins Florida congressional seat, padding House Democrats’ slim majority

Stories of Interest to Queers and Our Allies:

Anti-trans legislation negatively impacted mental health of LGBTQ+ youth

As high court signals Roe v. Wade reversal, states eye same-sex marriage protections

Murder of gay, math genius finally solved after man admits guilt 34 years later

Early access to gender-affirming hormones linked to better mental health, study finds – Trans people who had access to hormones in their early teens had less than half the odds of past-year suicidal thoughts than those who didn’t.

Biden administration to officially recognize trans & non-binary veterans’ genders – Patients can also indicate a preferred name to be used on their medical records

This Week in Sex Traffickers and Abusers:

Jeffrey Epstein-Related Cases to Watch After Ghislaine Guilty Verdict

How Jeffrey Epstein’s Estate Shielded Ghislaine Maxwell From Lawsuits

Prince Andrew to face civil sex assault case after US ruling

Matt Gaetz’s ex-girlfriend testifies to grand jury in sex trafficking probe

Anti-LGBT Ex-Michigan House Speaker Accused Of Molestation – Chatfield under criminal investigation for allegedly molesting a teenager

This Week in Haters, Deplorables, and Seditious Traitors:

Armed Michigan woman who ‘wanted to talk’ to Capitol Police about Jan. 6 riot arrested in D.C. It was the stockpile of illegal weapons she had in her car that was the problem… and why do you bring a pile of loaded guns to a talk?

Oath Keepers Founder Stewart Rhodes, Ten Oath Keepers Arrested On Seditious Conspiracy Charges

Leader of Neo-Nazi Group Sentenced for Plot to Target Journalists and Advocates

He wants to burn books about LGBTQ topics. He just got elected school board president

Neo-Nazi group leader sentenced to 7 years in prison

In Memoriam:

To Sidney, With Love

Sidney Poitier, Oscar-Winning Icon, Dies at 94

When Sidney Poitier risked his life for civil rights

Ronettes Singer Ronnie Spector Dead at 78

Ronnie Spector made hit songs that were built to last

Bob Saget was both wholesome and transgressive

Bob Saget, beloved TV dad of ‘Full House,’ dead at 65

Friday Five (indict them all edition)


Welcome to the first Friday of 2022!

The snow finally melted in our neighborhood. I have not yet taken down the Christmas tree (ever since figuring out many years ago that having a cut tree in the house made my winter hay fever {in Seattle’s climate hay fever season is at least ten months out of every year} much much worse, I’ve always had artificial trees). I often leave it up until Twelfth Night/Three Kings Day/Epiphany… but that was earlier this week, so I definitely need to get put the decorations away this weekend.

Anyway, it’s time for the first Friday Five on the year, in which I bring you: the top five stories of the week, five stories of interest to queers and out allies, and five stories about what we ought to do with the seditious traitors. Plus one very unwelcome death and a couple of things I wrote.

Stories of the Week:

Report: The exploding meteor over Pittsburgh produced blast equal to 30 tons of TNT

Is That a Burning Bush? Is This Mt. Sinai? Solstice Bolsters a Claim

Meteorologist says transportation officials ignored forecasts, leading to I-95 disaster

Opinion | Jimmy Carter: I Fear for Our Democracy

A Day that Will Live in Infamy

Stories of Interest to Queers and Our Allies:

Out Democrat forced to pull bill that would ban genital surgery on minors that actually happens

Elvira lost thousands of “horny old men” fans after coming out

Judge rules trans inmate with severe dysphoria can’t be denied surgery in historic decision

Gay kiss-a-thon forced Six Flags to drop its homophobic anti-kissing policy

How a music video about a gay teen may have saved hundreds of lives

This Week in How Do We Handle Seditious Treason:

Stonekettle Station: Insurrection, One Year On

Jan. 6 Didn’t Set Off A Wave of Right-Wing Terrorism. Here’s What Happened Instead

One Year After 1/6, Media Still Refuse to Recognize Authoritarian Christianity

Why DOJ is avoiding domestic terrorism sentences for Jan. 6 defendants

Jan. 6 tracker: Analyzing Capitol riot guilty pleas and sentences

In Memoriam:

Betty White, ‘Golden Girls’ Star and TV Legend, Dies at 99

Longtime LGBTQ+ Ally Betty White has died at 99 – The beloved actress who was set to celebrate her 100th birthday on January 17, 2022 died overnight in Los Angeles

Betty White Understood Gay Men, and We Loved Her for It – I never felt ‘handsome,’ but when I met Betty, she made me feel like I was

Betty White defied racist demands with her 1954 variety show – Betty White Once Helped Launch the Career of a Black Tap Dancer by Hiring Him for Her Variety Show

Things I Wrote:

Good-bye Betty

My New Year’s Wish for You for 2022

My New Year’s Wish for You for 2022


For some years now my final post of the year has been about my New Year’s Wish for everyone. Once again, this hasn’t been a great hope-inspiring year.

Even more people dying from ought to be a preventable disease. The angry science deniers/racists/homophobes seem to get more and more obstinate in their embrace of what can only be described at a death cult.

In other words, the world feels broken.

I never know what I’m going to type when I start this post each year. I sometimes worry that the voice in the back of my head that refuses to give up hope and tells me what I should wish will fail me. Despite the fact that I’ve often said that I appear the be fundamentally unable to stop finding at least a sliver of optimism, nothing lasts forever, right?

But as I was typing that paragraph, the surge of hope and optimism spoke up. So this year will not be the one, so, here is my New Year’s wish for you:

They say that time heals all wounds, but many of us know that time alone doesn’t heal everything.
Some wounds need love, hope, and light to heal. Some things that are broken can only be mended by with a lot of work. If we look at all of the ways things are broken, it seems overwhelming. There is just too much work needed to fix all of them.
Take a breath.
Think about the people who have loved you in the past. People who loved you in a way that helped you become the person you are today.
Thank them. And if they are no longer with us, think about the people you love. Thank them. Tell them you love them. Don’t be afraid to tell people you care about that you love them. Love them and let them love you.
Now, don’t worry about all of the things that are broken. Concentrate on things you can do something about. Let your love and light shine on the people in your life and the people who cross your path.
Love heals all wounds. Let your love out.

Good-bye Betty


I first remember watching Betty White when I was thirteen years old. She had just joined the cast of The Mary Tyler Moore show as the host of a fictitious show-within-showed called the Happy Homemaker. Her character, Sue Ann Nivens, was super cheerful and upbeat while on her show, but was a sharp-tongued nymphomaniac behind the scene and often played the antagonist to other characters on the show.

And she was hilarious.

Given her career before that, I’m sure that I had seen her before she joined The Mary Tyler Moore Show on the many daytime game shows that she frequently appeared in during the 60s and 70s. I’m also fairly certain that I had seen the political thriller Advise and Consent in which Betty played the one and only woman Senator in Congress. But it was Sue Ann who wriggled her way into my heart.

Sue Ann wasn’t the only iconic character she played. Many more people hail her portrayal of Rose Nylund in The Golden Girls. Rose was a very different character–though one who like all characters Betty assayed, had a bit of steel in her.

Being as funny, personable, and playing such a diverse set of characters was an incredible accomplishment. But there was so much more to her than that. There was her activism for various animal charities. There was the time in the 1950s when she defied the network executives that she was letting tap dancer Arthur Duncan (who was black) have too much screen time in her variety show. Betty gave him even more screen time after that. And she became not just someone the gay community idolized, but one of our fiercest allies.

And every person who met her in persons said that neither the personability nor the wittiness was an act. It was who she was.

Betty was famous for loving vodka and hot dogs–and for refusing to apologize for not being into anything more fancy or stylish. So, join me in raising a glass as we bid farewell to the great Betty White.


Others have thoughts on her passing:

Betty White, ‘Golden Girls’ Star and TV Legend, Dies at 99

Longtime LGBTQ+ Ally Betty White has died at 99 – The beloved actress who was set to celebrate her 100th birthday on January 17, 2022 died overnight in Los Angeles

Betty White Understood Gay Men, and We Loved Her for It – I never felt ‘handsome,’ but when I met Betty, she made me feel like I was

Betty White defied racist demands with her 1954 variety show – Betty White Once Helped Launch the Career of a Black Tap Dancer by Hiring Him for Her Variety Show

Friday Five (end of the year edition)


We have reached the final Friday in December–which also happens to be the final Friday of 2021, and just happens to be New Year’s Eve.

We have been snowed in. Our particular neighborhood is bounded on all sides by hills that become difficult to drive on if we get ice and snow. Various government agencies were pleading with people all week not to drive if they could avoid it. Buses are on emergency routes. (Just Google "Seattle bus slides down snowy hill" and you’ll be taken to some truly terrifying videos and stories from past storms). My husband took the bus in to work two days, which involved him walking further to catch a bus because of the emergency route avoiding steep hills. After his scare ride home the second work day of the week, when more snow came down, he decided to take the day off.

Anyway, it’s time for this week’s Friday Five in which I bring you: two stories about fictional parents, the top five stories of the week, five stories of interest to queers and our allies, five stories about discrimination, five stories about treason and deplorables, and five stories about the crime and punishment. Plus some notable deaths and a couple of things I wrote.

This Week in Fictional Parents:

The 2021 Darth Vader Parenthood Award for Outstandingly Horrible Fictional Parents

The 2021 Jonathan and Martha Kent Fictional Parent of the Year Award

Stories of the Week:

A 6th Grader Saves the Lives of Two People on the Same Day – Davyon Johnson, 11, has been honored for his Dec. 9 interventions but says he doesn’t understand the attention he’s drawn. It was “the right thing to do,” he said

Betty White’s Words of Wisdom at 100: ‘Avoid Anything Green’

Webb Space Telescope Got a Lucky Boost From Its Christmas Launch – The mission may have enough fuel to last over a decade, thanks to an ultra-precise launch

A pandemic-scarred year ends in darkness — but with hope on the horizon

21 most popular LGBTQ news stories of 2021 – This year’s most clicked on queer stories include a transgender Miss USA contestant, gay emperors, a nonbinary Olympian, lesbian bars and more

Stories of Interest to Queers and Our Allies:

Two California teachers were secretly recorded speaking about LGBTQ student outreach. Now they’re fighting for their jobs

Gay-Straight Alliance Wins Equal Rights After Judge’s Injunction

Gay Man’s Entire Family Helps Him Stand Up To Mom And Invite BF For Christmas

New Jersey Legislators Vote to Protect Marriage Equality

Colton Haynes shares photo he spent years trying to get wiped from internet

This Week in Discrimination:

Sodomy laws are still being used to persecute queer people

Pennridge School District removes LGBTQ books from libraries

Mom heartbroken by daughter’s suicide blames transphobic Republicans & health insurers

Oklahoma bill gives parents the right to have a book removed from a school library

Anti-Semitic Man Attacked Neighbor While Yelling Homophobic Slurs

This Week in Seditious Traitors and Other Deplorables:

‘Slow-motion insurrection’: How GOP seizes election power

A Lie Totally Devoid of Reality’: Venezuelan Businessman Sues Fox News, Lou Dobbs, Sidney Powell Over ‘Egregious and Sinister’ Claims Linked to 2020 Election

Rep. Liz Cheney hits back at Trump as Jan. 6 committee pushes Supreme Court to order release of White House records

Ex-Gaetz associate Joel Greenberg agrees to pay Seminole County nearly $2M in restitution

Jim Jordan ‘Committed a Felony’ With Text Message to Mark Meadows: Former Federal Prosecutor

This Week in Crime and Punishment:

Ghislaine Maxwell convicted in Epstein sex abuse case

Capitol rioters hit with severe sentences and sharp reprimands from judges – Some of the longest sentences have gone to rioters charged with ‘assaulting a police officer with a dangerous weapon’ I disagree with the headline. Four Puerto Rican nationalists who assaulted the capitol in the 1950s got sentences of 50 to 75 years for their crime. None of the convicted rioters — including those who assaulted capitol police — have been sentenced to more than 6 years.

Convicted of sex crimes, Jack Strain may have to pay costs of his prosecution, jailing – DA’s office also seeking restitution for former sheriff’s victims

A man convicted of killing four people in what authorities say was one of the most gruesome crimes in North Dakota history has been sentenced to multiple life prison terms without the possibility of parole

Non-Prosecution of Jeffrey Epstein Jail Guards Made Official

In Memoriam:

Desmond Tutu, South Africa’s ‘moral compass’ – Tutu, who died on Sunday at the age of 90, was considered ‘a thorn in the side of the apartheid government’

LGBTQ+ Rights Ally Archbishop Desmond Tutu Dies at 90

Harry Reid Didn’t Care What You Thought of Him

Harry Reid, former Senate majority leader and Democratic kingmaker, dies at 82

Gay Olympic Diving Star Ian Matos Is Dead at 32

John Madden, football legend, dies at 85

The final, beautiful goodbye of NFL legend John Madden

Things I Wrote:

We need a Rainbow Christmas more than ever!

On the seventh day of Christmas vacation…

On the seventh day of Christmas vacation…


Saw this above screenshot of a tweet being shared and found it funny. Though I immediately wanted to compose my own:

  • Dec 23: Vacation Day
  • Dec 24: Christmas Eve (company holiday)
  • Dec 25: Christmas Day/Saturday
  • Dec 26: Boxing Day/Sunday
  • Dec 27: Christmas Holiday Observance (company holiday)
  • Dec 28 – 30: Combo of vacation days and odd company holidays
  • Dec 31: New Year’s Eve
  • Jan 1: New Year’s Day/Saturday
  • Jan 2: Sunday
  • Jan 3: New Year Holiday Observance (company holidays)
  • Jan 4: Back to Reality

I’m totally on board with the idea that for those of us who take at least a week off for the holidays that time does become a fog and the notion of weekdays and non-weekdays is tenuous at best.

My husband went back to work Tuesday. Which means that I kept thinking it was Monday.

Seattle and the surrounding area is currently under a blanket of snow. The first flurries hit our neighborhood late on Christmas Even, but the real snow didn’t start until very late Christmas. I’ve bee trying to keep the hummingbird feeder thawed out with mixed success. The birds have been extra competitive for food in the cold.

The main roads seem to be drivable, but we can’t get out of our street without dealing with one steep hill or the other, and I have been hearing tires spinning out on the closer of those hills. I may have to head to the grocery store on foot if for no other reason to pick up some prescriptions if the roads don’t improve.

I’d had hopes for today, because the weather report a few days ago said the temperature would get above freezing for a while that day… but now it’s 28° and the forecast is it’s going to stay below 30F.

We need a Rainbow Christmas more than ever!

Nearly naked guy in Santa hat holds present. The words Nice and Naughty are written across his chest.
Nice or Naughty?

Rainbow Xmas 2021 (To the tune of ‘We Need a Little Christmas’ from the musical. Mame)

Slice the pumpkin pie,
And don’t be stingy with the homemade whipping cream,
Crank up the music,
I’m gonna sing and dance to drive the darkness away!

‘Cause we need a rainbow Christmas,
Right this very minute!
Eggnog by the fire,
With lots of brandy in it!

Yes we need a rainbow Christmas,
Right this very minute!
My lyrics may be getting slurry,
But Santa dear, it’s time to scurry!

So fling ’round the tinsel!
Put up more twinkling lights than the whole Vegas strip!
Slice up the pound cake,
I’ve got a great big table of deliciousness, here!

Cause we’ve grown a little rounder,
Dealt with bad news daily,
Got tired of all the downers,
Gone a bit stir crazy,

And we need some loving kindness,
‘Specially over FaceTime,
We need a rainbow Christmas now!

Fill every wine glass,
Then raise a toast to vaccines, essential workers, and
People who mask up,
‘Cause if we work together, we can beat anything!

And we need a rainbow Christmas,
Right this very minute!
Cocktails in the morning,
With bourboned cherries in them!

And I need a toasty lover,
Snuggling by the fire,
I need a rainbow Christmas now!

Yes we need a rainbow Christmas now!

Don we now our gay apparel!
“Merry Christmas! Shabbat shalom! Blessed Yul! Joyous Kwanza! Festive Festivus! Happy Christmas! Happy Hogswatch! Feliz Navidad! God Jul! Mele Kalikimaka me ka Hauʻoli Makahiki Hou! Beannachtaí na Nollag! Buon Natale! Priecīgus Ziemassvētkus un laimīgu Jauno gadu! Felix Dies Nativitatus!”

Friday Five (don’t be eeyore edition)


We have reached the fourth Friday in December. This year also known as Christmas Eve. Or as Kermit once described it in song, the day before the night before Christmas.

I finally seem to be over whatever I was sick with, for what it’s worth. Thursday was my first day of a 12-day Christmas vacation, which means–of course–that things were crazy at work on Wednesday and I worked a few hours later than I would like.

Anyway, it’s time for this week’s Friday Five in which I bring you: one story about simple joy, two stories about the season, the top five stories of the week, five stories of interest to queers and our allies, five stories about deplorables, five stories about the pandemic, and five stories about the Hugo Awards. Plus some notable deaths and a couple of things I wrote.

This Week in Joy:

JOY: Watch This Third-Grade Teacher Make A Hail Mary Shot

This Week in Tis the Season:

Recommended listening: Louis Armstrong’s ‘The Night Before Christmas’

Lowland residents to get Christmas weekend snow, with dangerous cold to follow

Stories of the Week:

Hanukkah isn’t Jewish Christmas. Here’s the story of the holiday

One Year In, Joe Biden Has Confirmed More Lifetime Judges Than Decades Of Presidents

A New Record for Gorey Art at Auction

A dinosaur embryo has been found inside a fossilized egg. Here’s what that means

Astronomers discover largest group of ‘rogue planets’ yet

Stories of Interest to Queers and Our Allies:

Students sued their school for the right to form a Gay-Straight Alliance. They just won

Utah billionaire leaves Mormon church, donates $600,000 to LGBTQ group

Author of ‘Gender Queer,’ one of most-banned books in U.S., addresses controversy

It’s official: Washington Blade gets designated seat in WH briefing room – LGBTQ newspaper secures seat in WH briefing room for first time

Jennifer Coolidge reading the “The Night Before Christmas” is the present you need this year – She is making the Yuletide G-A-Y

This Week in Haters, Deplorable People, and Their Victims:

Thousands of Isreali LGBTQ people sent terrifying texts after dating site hack exposes personal info

Convicted Gay Trump Ally Brandon Straka Cooperating With Authorities

Trump Can Go To Hell. Why Not Jail?

Morning Joe: Mitch McConnell’s latest remarks about Jan. 6 probe shows GOP senators are done with Trump

Michael Flynn’s Request Thrown Out Of Court In ONE Day – The ink barely had time to dry on Flynn’s request for a temporary restraining order to prevent the January 6th Committee from accessing his phone records or demand testimony from him

This Week in the Pandemic:

I Got COVID Three Times – Don’t worry, you (probably) won’t become me. But yes, you can get COVID twice, and even more

Covid-19 was third leading cause of death in 2020, driving record rise in death rate and nearly two-year drop in life expectancy

With omicron, you need a mask that means business

Vaccines, pills and data offer some Christmas cheer in face of Omicron advance

Omicron Is Our Past Pandemic Mistakes on Fast-Forward

This Week in Hugo Awards:

Cora Buhlert: Some Thoughts on the 2021 Hugo Award Winners and the Ceremony in general

Camestros Felapton: Hugo 2021 first reactions

Doris V. Sutherland: 2021 Hugo Awards Celebrate Imagination, Wonder, and an Arms Manufacturer

Nicholas Whyte: 2021 Hugos in detail

Doug Merrill: Hugo 2021 and Me

In Memoriam:

Joan Didion, famed American essayist and novelist, has died

Thomas Kinsella, one of Ireland’s finest poets, has died, aged 93

Things I Wrote:

Murderbot Wins Two Hugos! And other reactions to this year’s results

A ’54 Convertible Too, Light Blue

A ’54 Convertible Too, Light Blue

1954 Chevrolet Corvette Roadster, Pennant Blue

A few years ago I wrote a short post about one of my favorite Christmas songs, "Santa Baby" originally recorded by Eartha Kitt in 1953. I introduced that post with a screenshot of a conversation on twitter where it is revealed that there are a number of people out there who thought the Kitt’s song was using the name Santa as a codename for another person who happened to be her sugar daddy, rather than the most straightforward interpretation, Santa WAS her sugar daddy.

That conversation included a mention of a bad cover by Michael Buble, but that part didn’t register. Buble is someone whose work I just do not care for at all, so I apparently glossed over that bit.

So I was surprised earlier this week to come across a video of a guy singing an "aggressively gay cover of Santa Baby" which the singer said he’d decided to compose because of Buble’s "aggressively straight cover" of the same song.

Which is when it finally clicked with me: wait? Straight male singer Michael Buble recorded a cover of Santa Baby? Why would a straight male singer cover that song? I mean, that really is a bit WTF, you know?

And then description that it’s "aggressively straight." Did he change it so that he was singing to Mrs Claus? Asking Mrs Claus to give him all the outrageously expensive and extravagant gifts in the original?

I had to know. But I also refuse to listen to him sing. Fortunately one is able to find lyrics online. He doesn’t sing to MRs Claus. No, it’s to Santa, buddy. And oooooooh, boy! The people who slammed this as being an awful cover were being generous.

Several of the lyric changes just make no sense. For example, Kitt’s original included a line asking Santa to trim her tree with gifts bought at Tiffany’s. Tiffany’s is a famous jeweler. And they do sell ornaments. Very expensive ornaments made out materials like sterling silver or crystal, and sometimes decorated with gemstones. I always thought that Kitt’s lyric didn’t necessarily mean for Santa to buy her Tiffany ornaments, but rather to buy her enough Tiffany jeweled necklaces, bracelets, earrings, and so on to completely cover a tree.

Anyway, Buble changes that specific line from "with some decorations bought at Tiffany’s" to "with some decorations bought at Mercedes." Which I assume means Mercedes Benz, the car manufacturer. Mercedes Benz does license some companies to make ornaments based on some of their classic cars and their hood ornament… but the vast majority of these cost at most one-tenth as much as Tiffany’s ornaments. And unlike Tiffany’s jewelry, which could in theory be hung on a tree as if it were an ornament, a real car doesn’t work that way.

There are other problems with Buble’s cover, but I’ll only mention one more because it let’s be segue into talking about the original song. Whereas Kitt asked Santa for a "’54 convertible… light blue" Buble asks for a "’65 convertible… steel blue." Because light blue is apparently too girly for him?

Also, it is worth noted that Kitt recorded the song originally in 1953, so when she asked for a 1954 convertible, she meant the brand new, latest model. Not a classic.

Speaking of that convertible… for years I always assumed that Kitt was specifically asking Santa for a 1954 Chevrolet Corvette Roadster {pictured above}. One of the factory colors the ’54 model was available in was Pennant Blue. And it is a sweet looking car, right?

After I went down the rabbit hole of the aggressively straight (and bad) cover of the song, I decided I needed to listen to the original a few times to get the bad taste out of my mouth. Pulling that up in my digital library reminded me that Kitt recorded a sequel the very next year. In the sequel she describes out Santa got her everything she asked for last year–but now a lot of the presents have developed problems so she’s asking for upgrades.

In the sequel, she refers to the previous year’s car as a Cadillac, specifically. That would mean she got a 1954 Cadillac Eldorado Convertible, likely in Viking Blue Metallic (the other available colors, Newport Blue and Cobalt Blue Metallic are not what most people would call "light blue"). Which is still a nice car {pictured below}, though I don’t think it looks as cool as the Corvette.

Anyway, enough talk about the song. Let’s listen to the original, eh?

Eartha Kitt – Santa Baby (1953) – original TV broadcast performance on Christmas Eve Eartha Kitt - Santa Baby (1953)

1954 Cadillac Eldorado in Viking Blue Metallic.
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